Dan Meth's Blog

(click above image for a much better view of it)

In 1970, the Beach Boys arrived in Kelv to play a controversial concert at the Bladovak Opera House. Their intention was to bring a message of rebellion against the oppressive Perpendikulon government.

Unfortunately less that 1% of the Kelvic population understands English. The political lyrics of their song “Breakaway” were met by an uncomprehending audience.

The Beach Boys’ visit only deteriorated after the concert. Drummer Dennis Wilson tried to surf in the sea of Kyuuth and was mildly poisoned by the magnesium-filled waters. Singer Mike Love was involved in three separate street-fights. They were all so shaken by the strange things they saw in Kelv (especially leader Brian Wilson) that their demise as a band and individuals is widely regarded as a direct result of the tour.

**What the hell is this all about? It’s an excerpt from my upcoming magazine piece “The Kelv Enthusiast” to be published in Mammal Magazine, Spring 2007. Tune in for details.

-DAN METH